Who would have thought? But the library has peregrine falcons on their building. You can see them nesting on the webcam.
So – I had seen the Brokeback to the Future video, but this site has 8 cool videos to watch. There is an article that goes with it.
April is organ donor month. Sign up to donate your organs – through your driver’s license or an on-line organization such as Gift of Life. And then tell people that you did.
So – why did no one tell me that it was coming back on? I mean, they really should be sending notices about this. Commander in Chief is back – but they changed the day. I’ve been taping the same time slot, waiting for it to return. But, I just happen to be flipping channels on Thursday night, and I find that there’s a new episode! Why didn’t they advertise this change? Hmmm…
But if you missed it before, it might be worth a look now…not earth shattering TV, but fun to imagine possibilities…
| 2 Easter, B Christ Church, Winnetka April 23, 2006 |
I am currently serving at the Episcopal Chaplain at Northwestern University. For 2 years I’ve been meeting and worshipping with students. One of the major themes that has come out of our discussions is a struggle with faith. They are really searching to articulate their beliefs for themselves. They are trying to integrate their Sunday School knowledge, their experiences and their new learnings which come fast at the university. They are trying to make faith their own and need time to examine, to share ideas, and to ask questions. Through discussions in our community, they realize that they’re not the only people asking questions. Their struggle and doubt do not isolate them from the community, but rather the community becomes a safe place to ask questions and wonder together. We find answers in other people, the Prayer Book, and the Bible. We often find that in asking questions, we are often left with more questions and not always solid answers, but we always have time for thoughtful reflection. One of the groups that meets on a regular basis is Sermon Fishbowl – a lectionary based Bible Study group. This week, we were looking at today’s Gospel reading.
We got talking about Thomas – and how he’s been dubbed “Doubting Thomas” and how that’s never made any sense to me. The church seems to scoff at him – “Doubting Thomas” and the students wondered about that. Do you find that nickname helpful? Have you also wondered how he ever got stuck with that moniker? That label is not helpful to Canterbury students. And I don’t think that it’s helpful for anyone else struggling or asking deep faith questions.
So, putting the scoffing aside. What does the Gospel really say? Jesus comes to the disciples – grants them peace, “Peace be with you.” He sends them out as he had been sent and gives them the Holy Spirit – empowers them to proclaim the Good News. Jesus then comes back to see Thomas – to show him. But he doesn’t show Thomas anything that the others hadn’t seen. The others had seen the risen Christ and Thomas would like to see. Thomas says that he needs to touch the hands and the side, but the Gospel never says that he does. Jesus’ presence seems to be enough for Thomas to proclaim, “My Lord and my God.”
John also tells us his purpose. He is speaking to those who have not seen the risen Christ and will still come to believe. He is encouraging people who are not eyewitnesses you can have belief without touching Jesus’ hands and side.
And we here are 2000 years later – questioning, wondering, having faith from tradition handed down to us from the disciples who did see. While we don’t actually see the risen Christ, we can read the stories from the Bible, hear about the people of faith since then, and learn to recognize God working in our own lives. Our seeing God is not physical sight, but in our daily lives, and the faith that we have.
Our daily lives are filled with faith in God, thanksgiving for what God is doing in or lives, and sometimes with tests of our faith – either by things that happen to us or ways that we question to deepen our understanding of God.
Sometimes for us, faith is as easy and gentle as sitting on a grandmother’s lap. At other times, there is a struggle with doubt – a testing of faith.
I think that there are dangers in both of them. When our faith is easy – we don’t really examine or articulate it – it just feels great. In these times, we need others to question – so that we can articulate what we believe and how we have come to believe it.
When we are living in a state of constant struggle, maybe it’s because we’re thinking too much, holding control, or have made faith into an intellectual pursuit. In those times, maybe we need to let go – to feel God’s love in our hearts.
I think that we hold both ends within one’s self – at different times in our spiritual journeys, we experience both and hold in then ends in tension. There are times when we are able to see God’s perfection in the world – sometimes in nature, maybe by watching the sunrise over Lake Michigan. Sometimes we hear music that touches our soul. Other times we get a thought in our head and go around and around, and get stuck thinking about it. Or we think we need to think our faith into existence.
As each person holds this tension, we come together as community, and therefore, the tension also exists in the community – with some of us struggling and some being grounded in faith every time that we meet. But we come together today to worship – to celebrate the risen Christ. In community, we can support each other with stories of experiencing God. We can also provide examples for each other. When we see someone tithing, we can see that God is so important to that person that they would give their hard earned money back in thanksgiving to God. In community, we also care for others – the sick or homebound. And we give of our time – in the many activities that occur at the church. In our time together, we can also encourage during the times of struggle and ask questions during times of easy faith.
And as nice as it is to meet here together, we cannot stay here. Like the disciples, we are also sent, and empowered by the HS to proclaim Gospel of Risen Christ. We need to take our the faith to the world. This idea is scary to NU students – what about you? Have you ever felt terror at the thought of proclaiming your Christianity?
Faith and doubt – there seems to be fear and shame in proclaiming either. When we proclaim our faith, we might be afraid that we will be misunderstood or not sure how other will receive us. We might be ridiculed in trying to share our faith.
When we take our doubt out to the world there seems to be a stigma attached to it. We live in such an individualistic society that the perception is that we must figure it out on own. We might be afraid that people will scoff at us – “Doubting Thomas.”
But, I tell you, there are people who are hungering to hear the word of God. People are questioning and looking for a safe place to ask questions. They would like to have discussions about faith questions. They are yearning to deepen and articulate their faith.
They are waiting for invitation. They are waiting to hear your story. Will you invite them? Will you share your story? Will you – will Christ Church – be the community that encourages the testing and questioning of faith?
Faith is made stronger through testing, struggle, and articulation. Doing this work in community allows for support, loving challenges (What do you think about that? How did you come to that answer?), and a bit of cheerleading (Wow – that’s a great question! Keep going with that thought!).
Being called into the world, we are then able to share our faith and doubt with others who are searching, wondering, and questioning.
As we invite them into our community, we are given a chance to experience the grace of God who walks with us, loves us, and encourages us to grow into a deeper relationship with God and each other.
| Easter Day, Year B Canterbury Northwestern April 16, 2006 |
(Another outline - but has most of the points.)
We made it!
- long journey this week
- palms
- foot washing
- Jesus dying
- the Silence of Saturday
and now we’re here
- “Alleluia” is part of the vocab
- brunches and families
- Easter bunny
A big celebration at church
- read the Gospel
- um – oops
- not what we may have expected
o so they went out and fled from the tomb, for terror and amazement had seized them; and they said nothing to anyone, for they were afraid
- doesn’t provoke images of a triumphant God with loyal followers running out to tell the world – “Christ is risen! Our Lord is risen!” spreading lilies around
2 things
- Mark 1:1
o “the beginning of the good news of Jesus Christ, the Son of God.”
- Obviously, not the end – someone told someone something eventually
2000 years of Christianity
- still writing the story
- we are invited into the story
perhaps reassured by the women’s response
- Ever felt terror at the thought of proclaiming your Christianity?
- Blanch at the thought of running through town proclaiming “Christ is Risen!”
It seems that there are lots of reasons to be afraid for us today
- when should we do it?
- Is it really true?
- Will I be believed?
- Culture is changing – lots of people have never been to church and don’t know the stories
2000 years ago, the followers were faced with fear as powerful as our
- the dead body has gone missing
- an angel says, “do not be alarmed” – yeah, right
- the women had to wonder – Was Jesus really God? Was it really true?
- They don’t get it after the resurrection – and question and wonder
- BUT – at some point – they became emboldened to share what they knew
o maybe having some time to reflect – remember all that they had been told
o maybe seeing Jesus in Galilee
o definitely having community to share the responsibility/call of discipleship
- the Gospel was proclaimed, the good news was spread
- disciples shared their experiences – about walking with Jesus, their questioning about who he was and what he life meant, about thinking that he was going to fix life on earth to be perfect
- they invited others along in the journey – includes both doubt and faith
and we have been invited along by someone – family or friends
- we come in our faith and our doubt and our wonder
- together, we can be emboldened to proclaim
- find the people who are also wondering and searching
- live out our faith: “go and proclaim the Gospel, preaching and teaching and baptizing”
Today – we get to practice this together
- baptizing Clark
- journey together
- baptism = empowered to proclaim the Gospel
we do not have to have all the right answers
to be sure in our faith – because no honest one really is
But God doesn’t call us because we’re perfect or done questioning
- God calls us from weakness and failure into faith
- God calls us from isolation into community
- God calls us to proclaim what we know – to tell about those times when we felt God’s presence – and knew Christ’s love
In our daily lives, we can share our story
- Might seem like a huge challenge – but is usually just being aware of times when others are wondering. To ask questions like, “Do you ever think about God? Do you ever think that people with faith are crazy?”
- Honestly share your story – times when you thought that you got it – times when you’ve identified God working in your life – and times when you have doubted God’s existence
- invite others into the Canterbury community – come along for the journey – we’re not quite sure where we’re at or where we’ll end up – but we’ll go together, in wonder and questions and faith, continuing to search for God
- in times of greatest doubt, listen to where God is touching other people’s life, times when God has shown love
Easter is about God’s love for us
- the resurrection of Jesus is the core of Christianity
- the sign for us that God loves us – that Jesus would die that we would have forgiveness of sins – and resurrect Jesus so that we can have eternal life
Our joy today is being able to know that God loves us and would do amazing and, by some people’s standards, unbelievable things.
Our joy is that God loves the whole world – and we get the honor of telling everyone about God’s love for every person
And my prayer would be that together we find the courage through our experiences to boldly proclaim to the world, “Jesus Christ is risen!”
Looking for a new Stations of the Cross with relevant information? See what EPPN is doing with Stations for Global Justice and Reconciliation.
Today, I went down to see Ragtime at Columbia College (thanks, Shane!). Great production. Great singing and acting and good sets (not as cool as Fabulation, but that would be hard to beat). Quality theater experience.
Powerful play. If you get a chance, go see it. Faces issues of race – and how, even after so much time, life hasn’t changed much. Still racism and pain and violence. Oh, the quick movement to violence in the midst of conflict.
Appropriate for Holy Week, I think…
I read Good Harbor by Anita Diamant – on tape. It was an interesting, but not as good as The Red Tent. Worth the read and entertaining how she crafted the lives of two women who work their way into self-discovery and self-reflection. Amazing how often I’ve found these themes in things recently. Worth a read or a listen, if only for the fact that I think that Diamant is a talented writer.
So – in cleaning up, I found a tape of movies I hadn’t seen. One was Instinct, which I had missed from before. I almost didn’t watch it and I’m so glad that I just stuck it in and pushed play.
Why is it that people continue to think that it’s necessary to destroy creation? We must dominate, destroy, and control. Awful. Beautiful creatures destroyed for someone’s entertainments or because of fear.
There are some interesting points about the treatment of prisoners, also. Though of course there was a bit of drama, several psychological studies have shown what happens when “guards” are put in control over “prisoners” and the results – the disempowerment of the prisoners and the inhumane treatment by the guards – even people who considered themselves “kind” before the study.
Our systems are so broken.
Sorry - feeling a bit hopeless today. Holy Week symptom?
Henry and I went to the movies on Saturday (Thanks, Siobhan!) and saw Thank You for Smoking. I was interested in seeing it, and it was great. I enjoyed seeing the crafting of information and a story. Amazing the amount of effort being put into people continuing to smoke. Makes me think about our government and how things are controlled. Or not.
However, there was one point where the lobbyist seemed to turn on his main client and we never saw how that situation was resolved, or how much trouble he got in for giving information to the “other side.” Maybe that will be in the DVD extras.
Definitely worth seeing.
Henry and I went to see Fabulation: or, the Re-Education of Undine at the NeXt Theatre. It was really good. I’m really glad that we to see it. It was a preview show and they asked for our feedback at the end. I was happy with almost all of it. The acting was absolutely amazing – a small cast to handle many different characters. The sets were also great – props that doubled as a set and worked for many different locations. The plot had some important points about identity and self-discovery as Undine finds herself somewhere that she never expected to be.
I did have some problems with the main character addressing the audience at some points. I don’t mind this tool – it can be very effective, but there were a couple of instances where I thought that it was a bit much.
However, the drawback was very small compared to the greatness of the play.
| 5 Lent, Year B Canterbury Northwestern April 2, 2006 |
For both of my ordinations (priest and deacon), I had to say: “I solemnly declare that I do believe the Holy Scriptures of the Old and New Testaments to be the Word of God, and to contain all things necessary to salvation.” And I could say that and believe that, and I still do. For my salvation, I believe in the Bible and that Jesus is the Christ.
But today’s Gospel has me again thinking: I love the Bible and hate the lectionary. As a whole, the Bible is fabulous. But have you looked at this Gospel today? What in the world does it mean? There were several of us who have been talking about it for days and we still have a bunch of questions.
I can provide you with some nuggets of information that might provide some “answers” to some of the questions that come out of this passage. In the Gospel according to John, this happens right after Palm Sunday. There had been a big celebration and everyone is thinking that this is the king who will come in and save them all; the person who will take over the political system and help the oppressed. Jesus’ words, then, are shocking. This is not how they had imagined that things would go – Jesus dying and all.
The piece of Good News here is that the Greeks represent Gentiles and they can search out and find Jesus. Jesus is accessible to all – Jew, Gentiles, everyone. The mention of fruit indicates community – that we are called to be in community. Jesus doesn’t leave us alone, but encourages us to share our walk with other people.
And the last little pieces: God speaks like thunder. The people were not confused – they knew that it was God or angels – something divine. They were just confused on the meaning of the words. God speaking also brings up images of baptism and the transfiguration.
However, even with this information, we are still left with lots of questions. Even explaining some of it can create more questions.
Like: Did Jesus see the Greeks? And why do I have to hate my life in this world? I thought life was a gift. Why do I suddenly have to hate it?
It is at this point that I’d like to remind us all that the Bible is not an instruction book. We can’t just open it up and read some random passage for it to tell us how to live our lives. The Bible is great, and we need to read it – and usually together. Faith is complicated. There is no easy answer for any of us. I encourage us to continue to struggle with faith and what we believe. Even some things that seem clear, it often leaves us still create questions to go deeper and understand better.
Like, this Gospel ends with Jesus talking about that when he is lifted up, he will “draw all people to himself.” This sounds like great news for Christians, but also creates questions. You might ask, “what if a person doesn’t believe in Jesus?”
Or you might be saying, “I am that person who doesn’t believe in Jesus.”
Yes, I think that someone sitting in the pews may be doubting some part of faith – perhaps more than one of you. You may be doubting Jesus, you may be struggling with how to live out your faith, or maybe struggling with who God is – and how that whole Trinity – Father, Son, and Holy Spirit work together.
And what do I have to say about the skepticism and doubt? EXCELLENT! I am so happy that you are here through that questioning.
It’s okay to be questioning and wondering or feeling like you may never believe everything that you hear in church. But you have come into this room for some reason. It may be a routine or your Lenten discipline. But I think that it’s because you’re longing for God. The God shaped hole is empty and you think that this might be the place to fill it, even if you’re full of wonder and doubt. You are welcome here – come and question.
I know that church not always encouraging of questions. Or, even if they do welcome the questions, they’re not always public about it. What I’ve come to realize lately is that
we’re definitely not spending enough time sharing our thoughts and feelings. We’re not taking enough time to ask questions and wonder about what we truly believe – in community so that we can talk about what we think. We get together here and pray together, but there are plenty of things that we say together that you might be questioning.
Like – if you’re questioning God in general or how Jesus fits into the story, the Nicene Creed might be troubling to you. And then we’re even using the alternative version for Lent so that we might pay more attention to what may have become rote. Has that made you start to wonder?
“I believe in God…” I believe…credo… “to set the heart”
Oh – that might not be what we often think of, being that this environment encourages us to use our minds. But the creed is not about the mind – it’s about the heart. Yes, I have talked much about integrated heart, mind, and soul…but in this case, it’s more of a heart thing – a longing for God.
There are plenty of things that you might question about the service, but have never had the chance to ask. I’m encouraging us to ask those questions – to wonder together.
Some of you may be doubting or skeptical, but others may be in a dark night of the soul. This is tougher. It is more to the core of who we are and probably involves a lot of anger. When you’re in this situation, I encourage yelling. Go to a place that you know God is – maybe in a chapel or church, maybe another building, maybe the lakefront. Yell. Loudly.
“God – where are you? Why did you abandon me? How could this happen to me? LIFE ISN’T FAIR!”
Don’t be ashamed. Don’t feel guilty. It’s okay. And it’s good. God can totally take it. And in that moment, you are naming what God already knows. And in naming it, it starts allowing you to have control over what you feel and your experience. And then it’s not quite as huge – that fear and anger and sadness.
And perhaps you can feel how the Creator is longing for you – reaching out in invitation for you to come closer. I believe that one of those invitations was sent through Jesus.
Which brings us back to the Gospel. We are called to community – all are welcome – the Jews and Gentiles. Those with strong beliefs, those who doubt, those somewhere in the middle. And that is why we gather together in community: to surround ourselves with people who believe differently than we do, to have conversations and question together. We will have moments of faith where we can proclaim what Truth we know.
In our times of doubt we can hear where other people are and perhaps construct our own truths or ask more questions – or both.
And in community, we can share questions together and know that we don’t have to come up with the one right answer. We come to share together.
I was ordained to be a pastor and leader and to share my faith story. It’s my job to tell you how it works for me – and to assure you that God is love. I also am to hear how it works for you, listen to your questions, ask my own. And together, we come to understand some little slice of God. Because really, it’s just too overwhelming to think of the infinity of God – just way too huge. So, our questions may lead us to understanding just a tad bit better.
But as we question together, it also give us grace to reach out in love to others who question – give them assurance that we know that God is love. We are called to take God’s love into the world – with all of our questions, inviting others in to the conversation. We care for the needs of others out of compassion for the world, feeling a longing for God and suspecting that others might also feel it. Even when we’re not exactly sure about how to articulate it, or how much we believe at any one moment… we can be assured that
God is bigger than we can know and
Grace is broader than we can imagine.